As a new bride, I encountered many adjustments as two individuals tried to merge their lives together. We have many fun memories as we look back over those first years of marriage. The tiny one bedroom apartment on the sixth floor felt like a mansion to us. Movie night consisted of hooking the VHS machine up to our teeny, tiny computer monitor and eating the $.99 pizzas from the grocery store. Life was grand.
Well, mostly grand. Except for the occasional difference of opinion. One such conversation stands out in my mind some twenty years later. The snapshot of those few moments, those few words changed the course of my life forever.
What lead to the discussion remains lost in time. But I can hear the words from my husband as if it were yesterday,
“Don’t be so brutish.”
My snarly reply? “I’m not BRUTISH!!! What IS brutish?”
Brutish according to the Webster’s 1828 dictionary is insensible, irrational or stupid. Not the best compliment I’ve ever received. Proverbs 27:6 says, “Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.” I’m so glad I have a husband who doesn’t just blow kisses at my blind spots. He loves me enough to show me Jesus, no matter how much it hurts to hear.
Proverbs 12:1
- “lWhosoever loveth instruction loveth knowledge: but he that hateth reproof is BRUTISH” KJV
- “Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but whoever hates correction is stupid.” NIV
- “If you love learning, you love the discipline that goes with it— how shortsighted to refuse correction!” Message
Do you hate it when other people tell you you are wrong? Would you rather do it your way? I understand. I was there once too and I thought happiness came from insisting on my way. No matter which version you read Proverbs 12:1 in, its clear you don’t want this character trait!
That day, with open Bible in hand, my heart was broken. I had no idea such words were in the Bible. My commitment to run as far in the opposite direction from brutishness and towards knowledge has not necessarily been an easy road, but it has been one of growth and freedom.
Thank you Jesus for a friend who told me the truth even when the truth was ugly and painful. You have shown yourself faithful through the years. Wisdom and knowledge are precious jewels and nothing can compare to them. Please help me not stray to the right or the left where I depend on my own power. You are worthy, my King and Savior. Amen
Prov. 8:11 “for wisdom is more precious than rubies, and nothing you desire can compare with her.”
Prov 3:5-6 “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight”
Hebrews 3:15 “As has just been said: “Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts as you did in the rebellion.”
I LOVE this story! I must confess, when I’m rebuked, though I may deserve it, running the other direction seems most desirable… we’ve all been brutish at one time or another. It’s good to be teachable. God, help! 🙂
I know what you mean. I still sometimes struggle selective hearing – thankful for God’s grace and patience with me!