The LORD lives and blessed be my rock, and exalted be the God of my salvation. Ps. 18:46
Scrolling through Facebook, I felt a twinge of embarrassment as I read the comments on a post my newly married friend and her husband wrote back and forth. It started off cute(ish) but then got a bit too ooey-gooey, as if they forgot the rest of the world was watching. She was so excited to be married and she didn’t care if the world knew it.
That’s how I feel about Jesus. I hesitate to write from my heart because I don’t want to come off on the side of ooey-gooey. But, I wonder if you would be willing to indulge me for a minute as I share what Jesus means to me?
My Jesus, my Savior
Once I was in darkness. Chaos and confusion tormented my mind. Doubts, worries, and lies ate away at my soul. I looked for happiness in shopping and food. I kept myself so busy I assured myself I would win His love by being the best of the best at whatever I did. I looked to my husband and children to fulfill the emptiness in my heart. Busier and busier I became. Do you need a Bible study leader? I’m your girl. A teacher – yup, happy to. Another committee to serve on – of course! What is better than one History curriculum to use for homeschool my children – two of course!
My body became more and more tired. I ignored the warning cries and pushed harder. I could earn God’s love if only I did a bit more. My husband begged me to slow down, to rest. He just wanted me to be happy. I could almost reach happy – almost. But like the dish on the top shelf – the more I reached for it the further back in the cupboard it slipped.
Lipstick in place, I’d step out the front door and the world thought I had it all together. Only those living inside the four walls of my home knew the demons that endlessly tormented me.
Until one day,
He melted my heart of stone and breathed life into my lifeless soul. I’m alive because He lives. My Redeemer lives. I know it can sound syrupy and cotton candy-like but I can’t help it. He made me whole. He healed the broken and hurt parts of my heart.
What I couldn’t do on my own effort, He has done. He changed me. He saved me. From every waking breath, I bless His name.
Do you know Him? Do you know my Jesus? My friend, if you don’t there is nothing more in the world that I want for you. He was the answer to the emptiness I tried to fill with things, people and work. He quiets my mind and fills me with joy so I can love others well -not because I have to, but because I want to.
Please, I beg you, if you don’t know Him – search for Him. Call out to Him. Ask Him to reveal Himself to you. Like a Chinese finger trap the harder I tried the tighter the chains became. In surrender I found freedom.
Have you found healing and life in Jesus? Is He your Savior? How has He changed you? Leave a comment below.
My prayer comes from the words and an old hymn by Fanny Crosby who was blind all but the first six weeks of her life.
Blessed assurance, Jesus is mine!
Oh, what a foretaste of glory divine!
Heir of salvation, purchase of God,
Born of His Spirit, washed in His blood.
This is my story, this is my song,
Praising my Savior all the day long;
This is my story, this is my song,
Praising my Savior all the day long.
Perfect submission, perfect delight,
Visions of rapture now burst on my sight;
Angels, descending, bring from above
Echoes of mercy, whispers of love.
Perfect submission, all is at rest,
I in my Savior am happy and blest,
Watching and waiting, looking above,
Filled with His goodness, lost in His love.